Pre, during, or post COVID, it’s equally challenging for us when our kids and teens resist what we know will help them feel good, help them grow as a person, and so forth. Think, trying out a new activity, taking a walk with a friend, or getting some physical activity, just to name a few. How often do you want to scream, “Get off TikTok and do something for gosh sake!!”

Many parents tell me about their anxious feelings related to all the things their kids are unwilling to do. This dilemma feels more daunting right now because our kids have gotten less of so many things — while getting so much more “consuming” type of screen time (i.e., the passive, entertainment type).

How do external rewards fit into trying to get our kids to do the things they aren’t doing? Don’t rewards just crush internal motivation? And is it bad if we, parents, do some social engineering on behalf of our kids?

Today I address these questions and suggest ways you might help your loved one shift into a slightly higher gear.